You keep quiet. You have absolutely no idea what you *could* say in this situation.
The saleswoman however has no such disadvantage - she instantly recovers her composure and launches into a new pitch. You'd be impressed with her professionalism, if Alexis wasn't doing such a good job of keeping you distracted.
"Of course Amazatic Vacuums are more than a simple cleaning device. They have a myriad functions that can be a boon to almost any life style."
She walks over to where Alexis is giving you an enthusiastic reaming on the floor as Karen watches with amusement. She crouches down in front of you, holding the nozzle of the vacuum cleaner in one hand. She looks pretty and professional in her suit and thick rimmed glasses, and almost supernaturally neat and clean, somehow. You goggle at her in amazement, gasping with each thrust. She smiles at you politely, before looking up at Alexis and ignoring you.
"Now, while clearly you have no problem both exciting and controlling your.. um.. husband?"
"My pet," says Alexis behind you. Some how, you can *hear* her smiling as she says it.
"His name is bunny," adds Karen, helpfully.
"Your pet bunny, how darling," she says, giving you another bright, dismissive smile, "but, have you ever considered the beneficial effects the introduction of vacuum play could bring to your relationship?"
"I can't say I have..." says Alexis, pounding you more slowly now as she listens to the saleswomans pitch with amusement.
"The effects can be most remarkable, amusing and.. visually satisfying," the saleswoman says, smiling wickedly and raising an eyebrow, "Well then, would you care for a demonstration?"
Holy crap, this isn't going where you think it's going, is it? This is just getting insane... Maybe you should try to protest... or would that make the situation worse? |